South Florida Reviews

All posts in the South Florida Reviews category

Recent DVD Release: This Is 40

Published May 1, 2013 by mrsrag

Starring: Paul Rudd, Leslie Mann, Maude Apatow, Iris Apatow, Jason Segal, Megan Fox, Charlyne Yi, Robert Smigel.

Rated: R.  Comedy.  Running Time: 2 hours 14 minutes.

I am a fairly big fan of writer/producer Judd Apatow.  I loved Freaks and Geeks, the series that launched more careers than my daughter Gina launches F-bombs.  And there’s Ron Burgundy, 40 Year Old Virgin, Knocked Up, Step Brothers, Year One, Bridesmaids.  The guy makes me laugh, most of the time.  He does throw in the occasional dud, Forgetting Sarah Marshall, Wanderlust, Five Year Engagement.  But honestly, even those sub-par efforts had some decent moments and entertainment value.  This Is 40, a quasi-sequel to Knocked Up, in that we pick up the lives of the always unhappy couple Pete (Rudd) and Debbie (Mann) and their growing kids Sadie (Maude Apatow) and Charlotte (Iris Apatow), is at the very bottom of his body of work IMO.  While Pete and Debbie were fine side-kicking Seth Rogen and Katherine Heigl in Knocked Up, watching their train wreck of a marriage and life for a Hobbit-like two plus hours, was excruciating.  Businesses failing, marriage failing, oldest daughter spoiled and screeching throughout, just very few laughs in this “comedy”.  I thought the youngest Apatow was the best of the clan here.  Iris’ Charlotte was cute, wise beyond her years, and had more sense than the rest of her family.  You know a movie is in trouble when a highlight is Megan Fox.  She does a fine little parody of her persona, and seems to being having fun with it.  This Is 40 is nepotism at it’s best, or should I say worst. 

I usually love an Apatow flick.  The endless sea of hilarious one liners from the bulk of his work have been uttered from my lips millions of times.  I had a lot of hope for This Is 40.  Cute Paul Rudd.  Bitchy, but always a hoot, Leslie Mann.  I dug their take on marriage in Knocked Up.  It rounded out that little film nicely, but on its own this story of real life problems is weak.  I mostly enjoy going to the movies to lose myself or to gain a fresh perspective on something.  There was no such lesson or shred of entertainment to be gained here.  Also, it was just strange.  Was this a sequel?  Were Rudd and Mann just supposed to play the same couple in a parallel universe?  It was all very confusing.  The moments of laughter were fleeting, the story seemed forced or stretched and the cast didn’t have its usual spark of chemistry.  And it was WAY too long.  It was like an epic tale of doomed suburbia.  This film felt like the friend that won’t stop telling you about their relationship problems, but won’t do anything to resolve their issues.  Ross is definitely right in stating that the highlight of this diddy was Iris Apatow.  That little nugget has a bright future in acting.  I am not completely renouncing my allegiance to Mr. Apatow.  I would only like to say to him: “Judd, listen dude, take a little time off.  Come up with something fresh and get back to us.  Don’t just spit movies out for the cash and to distribute titty shots of your wife.  We’ve all seen them…about one hundred times since Big Daddy.  We get it – you think she’s hot.  We do too, you don’t have to keep bombarding us with it.”

Boring, long and not funny.  Definitely three things you don’t want in a comedy.  It really is hard to figure out what they were trying to accomplish here.  Did they look at this finished product and say, “Oh yeah, we nailed it!”?  Hey, I’m with Maria, I’m not giving up on Apatow, but you never know.  Look at  M. Night Shyamalan.  The guy wows with The Sixth Sense, Unbreakable and Signs.  Then slowly drags us down into the abyss with The Village, Lady in Water and The Happening.  You could draw some parallels, both have been truly great and REALLY bad.  No, no ,no, I have faith.  Judd will be back.  My advice: give Will Ferrell a call.

I stand by the fact that on the set of Signs, M. Night & Joaquin Phoenix were drinking bad water.  It seems those two lost something after that.

joaq

How’s that rap career going?  Also, quick note to self Joaquin – write the words on the opposite hand next time.  Anyways…Apatow will be back.  Just did not have the right formula for This Is 40.  If I were you, I’d just skip this one altogether.  Your welcome.

Ross’ Rating: 1 Gummy Bear out of 5.

Maria’s Rating: 1.5 Gummies.

Recent DVD Release: The Hobbit: An Unexpected Journey

Published April 29, 2013 by mrsrag

Starring: Ian McKellen, Martin Freeman, Richard Armitage, Ken Scott, Graham McTavish, William Kircher, James Nesbitt.

Rated: PG-13.  Adventure/Fantasy.  Running Time: 2 hours 49 minutes.

 

When the Lord of the Rings film series was released in 2001, I had yet to embrace my inner nerd.  I was still in high school and my boyfriend at the time insisted we go see it.  It was by no means a movie I would ever have chosen to go see on my own, but I was more than pleasantly surprised.  In fact, I absolutely loved it.  Legolas and Aragorn were total babes.  The hobbits were these tiny, adorable gluttons.  I wanted nothing more than to live in Rivendell with Hugo Weaving and the rest of the elves and Gandalf was nothing short of a badass.  Lest, the emancipation of my inner nerd.  The cinematography and special effects were spectacular, the story of good versus evil was captivating and the tale of the unlikely hero was inspiring.  Despite all of this, I wasn’t exactly thrilled when I heard The Hobbit was in production.  Perhaps because I thought it was odd to release it after the Lord of the Rings, when it actually precedes the trilogy.  Ross suggested we give it a look once it was out of theatres and I agreed that I could wait, which is already a bad sign.  We were both huge fans of the LOTR, so why weren’t we rushing out to go see it?  Even without our patronage, the film still broke December box office records.  I found the film to be a big disappointment.  It was missing something.  Maybe it was missing the element of surprise because we as viewers already know how the story ends.  Or maybe it just had the predictable qualities of its big screen predecessors.  Either way, I found myself dozing off during its almost 3 hour running time.  Sad, but true.

After Gandalf (McKellen), how about that starring line-up?  Martin Freeman.  Richard Armitage etc.  I’m sure they are all fine actors, but look up their histories and you’ll find small parts galore, and most of them are from the UK or New Zealand.  This tells me one thing, the CGI animation is the star of the show now.  Obviously, it was a huge part of the LOTR trilogy, and it was most breathtaking, but the reason I couldn’t wait for the next one to come out was because of the great story and the characters.  I cared deeply about them (my inner nerd has always been alive and well btw. “Live long and prosper!”) and couldn’t wait to see what was going to happen.  While watching The Hobbit, when I wasn’t fighting dozing off, all I could think was “been there, done that, seen that, and it was better before.  Much better.”  In LOTR, you had a fellowship of heroes on a seemingly hopeless quest to save Middle Earth from the purely evil Sauron, who wanted to lay waste to all of it.  In The Hobbit, our heroes are trying to reclaim the dwarves mountain home from a gold-loving dragon (huh?) who ran them off.  Not quite equal on the importance scale.  Beyond that, this group doesn’t make me root for them, or care.  This Bilbo Baggins (Freeman) is boring.  I know Frodo was no stand-up comic, but he was earnest and honest and we also had Sam, Merry and Pippin too.  One hobbit is not enough, and WAY too many dwarves.  Frodo, the old Bilbo, Lord Elrond (Hugo Weaving), Lady Galadriel (Cate Blanchett) and Saruman (Christopher Lee) all made cameo appearances, and Andy Serkis is back voicing Gollum, but they are little help.  Gandalf leads the new crew and they walk and walk, they scale mountains that crumble and fall on them.  They get attacked by Orcs and trolls.  They hook rides on giant eagles.  Sound familiar?  

Yes!  You are undoubtedly correct.  It has all been done and seen before.  And as it mercifully ended, we could tell that there will be more of the same to come.  I couldn’t be more uninterested.  I wish they had released these movies in sequential order.  I think that would have made a huge difference.  And it feels like a total money grub to extend this novel into a trilogy.  They should have quit while they were ahead.

If The Hobbit had come before the LOTR trilogy there is no doubt I would have enjoyed it more.  Unfortunately it didn’t.  Another problem is, with all the great trilogies and more-ogies, each individual movie could stand on it’s own.  Harry Potter.  Twilight.  The Matrix.  Star Wars.  Star Trek.  LOTR.  The Bournes.  The Hobbit was a nearly three hour set-up.  Nothing really happens and nothing is resolved.  The beginning of seven and a half to nine hours worth of recycled Middle Earth.  If you’re served filet mignon for the first time and you love it, then someone sets down Salisbury steak in front of you and tells you it’s filet, it won’t take many bites to know you’ve been had.  Maria mentioned The Hobbit broke December box office records.  I’ll bet the grosses go down with each film.  Then again, maybe I’m underestimating the public’s love of Salisbury steak.

Maria’s Rating:  2 Gummy Bears out of 5.

Ross’ Rating:  2.25 Gummies.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Movie Review: Jurassic Park 3-D

Published April 18, 2013 by mrsrag

Starring: Sam Neill, Laura Dern, Jeff Goldblum, Sir Richard Attenborough, Samuel L. Jackson, Wayne Knight, BD Wong, Bob Peck, Ariana Richards, Joseph Mazzello, Martin Ferrero.

Rated: PG-13.  Sci-Fi/Adventure.  Running Time: 2 hours 7 minutes.

Another blatant money grab?  Absolutely.  But who cares!  Maria and I took Ethan to his first PG-13 movie (he’s almost 10).  He was a trooper and what a great movie to cut your teeth on, one of the all-time greats.  I’ve seen the movie numerous times over the years, but watching it again on the big screen was fantastic!  The 3-D was mostly useless, but we were in an IMAX theater, and the overall experience couldn’t have been better.  Jurassic Park was certainly not showing its age.  At twenty years old, it still felt like a new release.  One could forget what a cutting edge film it really was, it basically started the CGI age.  Beyond that it’s just a really great story, presented to us by the finest director of my lifetime, Steven Spielberg.  I’m sure that everyone knows the plot, so no need to recap.  It’s the indelible images that stay with us forever.  Laura Dern elbow deep in Triceratops poop.  The “blood sucking lawyer” (Ferrero) bitten in half right off the toilet.  The T-Rex chasing the Jeep as Goldblum and Dern bellow out some awesome screams.  Timmy (Mazzello) getting blown off the electric fence, “three.”  The car chasing Tim and Dr. Grant (Sam Neill) down that tree!  Even if you’ve seen it a million times it keeps you on the edge of your seat.  Then there are the unforgettable lines (Goldblum has most of the best ones):  “Must move faster!”, “You are eventually planning to have dinosaurs on your dinosaur tour?”, “Hold onto your butts.”, “We’ve spared no expense”, “Life found a way.”, “You know what that is?  That’s an impact tremor.”  It sure as shit is, and you may want to get the hell out of there before you get eaten!

My favorite Goldblum line: “Remind me to thank John for a lovely weekend.”  I was mostly excited to see this on behalf of Ethan and his rite of passage into PG-13, but also a little amped myself for a T-Rex’s huge dome in my face.  I had some big expectations and Jurassic Park did not disappoint.  I’ve always loved dinosaurs and I remember the first time I saw this ’90’s classic.  I didn’t get to see it in the theatre and the premise was a bit over my head at the time, but the visuals were still vividly spectacular.  I can’t recall exactly how old I was, but I remember being impressed by the movie magic I was witnessing.  It was an honest thrill to get the chance to see it in an IMAX theatre.  Although, I thought they would have used the 3D with more vigor.  However, Ross made an excellent point that perhaps the cameras it was first filmed with are not compatible with today’s technology.  The T-Rex, incredible.  The Velociraptors, amazing.  The Brontosaurus’, magnificent & my personal favorite.  It will always be the Brontosaurus to me…

http://wiki.answers.com/Q/Why_did_paleontologists_change_the_name_of_the_brontosaurus

…I don’t care what the scientists and history books say.

I loved dinosaurs as a kid.  I even sent away for these free booklets on them from the Rex Trailer Show for my whole class, when I was in first grade.  Recently read an article in EW about the 20th anniversary release of Jurassic Park, and apparently Spielberg was a dino fanatic too.  He can also get you squirming in your seat with fear, anticipation and delight, all at the same time.  He did this to me for the first time with his directorial debut, 1971’s Duel.  I’m not sure if many of you have had the opportunity to see this one, but if you ever get the chance, watch it.  Preferably at night, alone.  A somewhat dated story of a travelling salesman played by Dennis Weaver (best known as McCloud) who is terrorized on the back roads of America by a semi-truck driver who is trying to run him off the road, or just plain run him over.  This was far before the age of cell phones, so the story wouldn’t work today, but take yourself back, and this is a terrifying tale.  The kicker?  You never see the truckers face.  His booted feet once, but nothing else.  Just that ominous, almost living truck, ever gaining and loud, filling up the rearview mirror.  This was a harbinger of things to come from Spielberg.   I won’t attempt to list even a portion of the true classic entertainment this man has brought us, but who else could have turned a movie with a broken mechanical shark, into the iconic Jaws phenomenon that swept the World.  Did you know that you don’t see the shark in it’s menacing, monstrous entirety until 90 minutes into that movie??  A movie 128 minutes long!  That is genius…the genius that is Spielberg.  Thank you Steven, for EVERYTHING.  As far as Jurassic Park goes, at the very end Dr. Grant, following his numerous brushes with death, tells Richard Attenborough’s character:  “John, after careful consideration, I’ve decided not to endorse your park.”  I certainly don’t blame the good doctor, but I can’t concur.  I think the Park is spectacular and here to stay.  Hey, “there are people dying out there!” 

Jurassic Park has still got it – even after 20 years.  And it always will.  If you’re a fan, go treat yourself.  It truly was worth the price of admission to see this on the big screen.  And bringing Ethan with us was a trip.  During one part of the movie he looks over at me and goes, “Hey, are all the scary parts done?”  I honestly couldn’t remember, so I said, “I think so.”  Within the next minute, a Velociraptor erupts on the screen – only inches away from Dern’s throat.  He almost jumped across the theatre, but he took it in stride.  Of course, I got the blame for not knowing the full sequence of a 127 minute movie!  We had a lot of fun, to say the least.  The only thing I was feeling nostalgic for were the old prices.  Between tickets, snacks and parking we spent over $60.00!!  Chew on that number for a while.

Ross’ Rating:  5 Gummy Bears out of 5.

Maria’s Rating: 4 Gummies.

Recent DVD Release: Red Dawn

Published April 14, 2013 by mrsrag

Starring: Chris Hemsworth, Josh Peck, Josh Hutcherson, Adrianne Palicki, Isabel Lucas, Connor Cruise, Edwin Hodge, Brett Cullen, Jeffrey Dean Morgan.

Rated: PG-13.  Action.  Running Time: 1 hour 33 minutes.

Remakes.  They are the bane of my existence.  IMO, we don’t need a new Footloose or another Total Recall.  But Ross was interested in seeing this one and I agreed with modest expectations.  The 1984 original was one of my family’s classics and coined such famous lines as, ‘Avenge me boys!’, which we still toss around with giggles today.  Just check out this list of Hollywood remakes set to release in the near future:

http://www.nextmovie.com/blog/upcoming-movie-remakes/

I’m not sure why, but I feel irked when I read through this list.  Don’t get me wrong, I’ve seen a few remakes that aren’t bad, but don’t we have any new material?  At least in the case of such endeavors as Red Dawn, I understand the premise behind remaking the film.  The special effects that are available in this age of cinema add a crisp, new edge to films of this nature.  But Footloose?!?  Will there ever be anyone who can replace Kevin Bacon as Ren?  And did someone seriously choose to put Colin Farrell in the role of Douglas Quaid/Hauser?!?  I love seeing his hot, black Irish mug on the screen, but he won’t soon replace Schwarzenegger.  Honestly, I haven’t seen it, but I just can’t picture him saying ‘See you at the party Richter.’  Perhaps I am just a salty cynic, but I love the classics.  I don’t mind a few remakes surfacing every couple of years, but I don’t want Hollywood getting too complacent with churning out old shit because it’s easy.  Read some new scripts!  I’d love to see something different.

Oh man, 1984, what a year!  Not only the year that Maria and Rachel were born, but also arguably, one of the greatest years of movie releases ever.  How about: Ghostbusters, The Terminator, The Karate Kid, Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom, A Nightmare on Elm Street, Amadeus, Sixteen Candles, Footloose, Gremlins, Beverly Hills Cop, Splash, The Natural, Revenge of the Nerds, Romancing the Stone, The Last Starfighter, Purple Rain, Bachelor Party, Body Double, Against All Odds?!  Can you believe that line-up?  And you know what the most popular movie of all was in 1984?  Yup, Red Dawn.  Everyone knows the story, right?  America invaded by Russians and Cubans in the original, the more appropriate North Koreans in this version.  In both, it’s the local high school kids who rise up, led by the slightly older former football star.  Patrick Swayze in 1984 and Chris Hemsworth this go round.  Hey I’m not stuck in the past, but the original was kick ass, with Swayze, Charlie Sheen, Lea Thompson, Jennifer Grey, C. Thomas Howell, Harry Dean Stanton, Powers Boothe.  Wreaking havoc on the invaders, guerilla style to the battle cry, Wolverines!!  Great stuff.  So I was indeed curious to see the updated version, albeit with very low expectations.  And honestly, it wasn’t horrendous.  The crew is pretty much matched up, and Hemsworth is a worthy leader.  Not what I would call A-list material just yet, but with Snow White, Thor and Red Dawn, he’s getting there.  Josh Peck was adequate in the Sheen role of the younger brother, and Josh Hutcherson (The Hunger Games) could have had a harder edge in his rendition of Howell’s Robert.  But the bad guys were hugely inept.  They had our heroes dead to rights like five times and couldn’t put them away.  This Red Dawn will never reach the classic status of the original, but if you rent it, you probably won’t fall asleep or wish you could get the hour and a half of your life back.      

It was O.K.  That’s the best way I can put it.  The best part of this movie was the first fifteen minutes – up to the visually pleasing scene when North Korean paratroopers drop into town.  It probably doesn’t help that we’ve also seen, ‘Tomorrow, When the War Began’, an Australian flick about teens fighting an invasion of their hometown.  To my astonishment, this movie gives no claim to Red Dawn, but I assure you it is loosely based on the same plot.  And how coincidental that Red Dawn is released in the Redbox right around the same time that we find ourselves in a precarious situation with the North Koreans.  I jokingly had a conspiracy theory that it was all planned, but in truth, that fat bastard from N.K. is just as insane and unpredictable as his dead dad.  If our diplomats had any sense, they’d just bribe him with a Twinkie.

kim

Would it kill him to buy a treadmill?  Or try some of the native fish?  Anyways, I digress.  Red Dawn will not be taking the place of the original, or winning any awards, but it was worth a watch.  And proved to have some relevant plot twists.

Oh come on Maria, give Kim Jong Un a break.  He can’t help he’s so fat, he doesn’t shit after all, just like his Pop. http://www.ugo.com/web-culture/kim-jong-ils-weird-moments-kim-jong-il-doesnt-pee-or-poop  Hey, we kicked their ass in Red Dawn and we’ll ruin them for real if they keep this nonsense up.  “America, fuck yeah!  Lick my butt and suck on my balls!”  Last song quote courtesy of two great Americans, Trey Parker and Matt Stone.

 Maria’s Rating:  1.5 Gummy Bears out of 5.

Ross’ Rating:  2.5 Gummies.