Starring:  Jennifer Garner, Joel Edgerton, CJ Adams, Odeya Rush, David Morse, Dianne Wiest, Ron Livingston, M. Emmet Walsh.

Rated PG.  Drama/Comedy/Fantasy.  Running Time: 2 hours.

I know this movie isn’t on our “coming soon” page, but we just got back from our long trip and Ethan really wanted to see it.  Truth be told, Maria was pretty stoked too.  The movie introduces us to a nice couple, Cindy and Jim Green (Garner and Edgerton), who both work for the Crudstaff family (the controlling family of their small town, think Mr. Potter in It’s a Wonderful Life), that own the pencil making factory and pencil museum that employs most of the town.  Cindy and Jim want to have a baby desparately but for some reason, biological we would assume, they find out they cannot.  Devastated and crying, they eventually sit down and start writing the wonderful traits they believe a child of theirs would have been blessed with.  They put the pieces of paper in a wooden box and bury it in their garden.  I don’t think I’ll give too much away here by telling you that Timothy magically “grows” out of that garden and that their lives are never the same.  The Odd Life of Timothy Green flows beautifully, but predictably, from this unique beginning.

I really enjoyed this film, but I thought some of the themes were a bit heavy for children.  There were a few occasions during the film, in which we had to explain some of the circumstances to Ethan.  I found myself tearing up several times throughout as the plot examined every aspect of life: birth, death and all the challenges in between.  Timothy (Adams) is a charming child that you instantly love from the moment he graces the screen.  Not only because of the joy he brings the Green’s by giving them the child they’ve always dreamed of, but also because of the joy he brings every character in the story.  One of the most touching moments is the bonding between the boy and his “Uncle” Bub (Walsh), as they laugh while the elderly man is in the hospital.  They share the same sense of humor, as the Green’s had expressed in their wishes from the wooden box.  There are many scenes such as this where the good natured little boy endears all who surround him, including the audience.

The Odd Life of Timothy Green was wonderfully cast and the actors were all spot on.  The supporting cast was great, with Livingston and Wiest perfect in their roles as the domineering Crudstaffs.  David Morse as Jim’s disappointing father and Walsh as the endearing Uncle Bub.   But to me the true surprises were from the newcomers, Edgerton, Adams and Rush.  I’m very good at recognizing actors from their previous roles, but I have to admit I’ve never seen these three before.  I do have a good feeling we’ll be seeing more of all of them.  Jennifer Garner has her usual, likeable persona on display, and she has an extremely believable maternal way about her (guessing that’s drawn from her real life experiences).  This role had a quite similar feel to her turn in Juno, though much larger of course.  The interaction between Cindy, Jim and Timothy is riveting from start to finish.  Timothy’s quasi romance with the equally quirky Joni (Rush) is another highlight.  As I mentioned, I found the plot mostly predictable, and the ending isn’t exactly right up my alley, but I was engaged and moved from start to finish.  I agree with Maria that some of the themes are probably beyond kids younger than 12 or 13, and Ethan (8) had some very valid questions on our way to the car (unfortunately I can’t share them with you without spoiling major plot points.)  Timothy Green is not movie perfection, but Peter Hedges screenplay of an Ahmet Zappa (son of the iconic singer Frank Zappa) story is certainly worth your two hours.  It’s an original idea, beautifully performed and has a heart as big as the Grinch’s when it “grew three sizes that day.”

This wonderfully magical story made me cry, laugh, smile and finally, reflect.  I can’t guarantee that you’ll love it, but I can guarantee that it will make you feel something.  The story has so many valuable lessons to convey to people of all ages.  Messages about loving each other, being kind to one another and accepting people who we may otherwise think of as odd.  I think acceptance and tolerance is the most relevant message for the younger crowd, as we’ve seen countless incidents of bullying over the past few years.  Bullying has always been a problem, but it seems that over the past decade it has become more severe in its cruelty.  Timothy Green reminds us that sometimes people we perceive as wierd or odd, may just be different.  And just because something is different and we don’t understand it, doesn’t mean we should automatically fear it.  Lastly, one attribute they wished for Timothy was to “never give up”.  This was my favorite attribute and one I wish every child could have, because they all should feel that anything is possible.

Ross’ Rating:  3.5 Gummy Bears out of 5.

Maria’s Rating:  4 Gummies.

Starring the voices of: Ray Romano, John Leguizamo, Denis Leary, Queen Latifah, Peter Dinklage, Wanda Sykes, Jennifer Lopez.

Rated PG.  Animated.  Running Time: 1 hour 34 minutes.

If you’re wondering if you should dish out the cash to go see another Ice Age movie, just take a look at the all star cast.  In the fourth installment of this series Manny, Diego and Sid meet some new leading ladies and a few menacing men.  The Ice Age veterans are joined by newcomers Jennifer Lopez, Wanda Sykes, Peter Dinklage and a few cameos including rappers Drake and Nicki Minaj.  Manny, Diego and Sid find themselves floating from their comfortable home following an unfortunate shift in the continents.  The shift is caused by the acorn obsessed Scrat, one of my favorite recurring characters.

Yes, who knew that Scrat single handedly turned the super continent, Pangea, into the seven continents we have today.  And all in pursuit of his unattainable acorn.  Last month the Madagascar gang had their chance, and now Ice Age’s strangest herd in history, bring us their fourth epic adventure.  As Maria has told you, the original three: Manny, Sid and Diego are floating away on a large slab of ice and get separated from their extended family of Ellie (Manny’s mate), Peaches (their daughter) and Crash and Eddie (the two opposums and Ellie’s “brothers”.)  They have to get back before the rest of the animals get forced into the ocean by the new, moving continents.  As you might guess, there are numerous obstacles in their way.  The biggest would be a boatload of pirates, led by the menacing simian, Captain Gutt, voiced brilliantly by the always awesome Dinklage.  (If you haven’t seen Game of Thrones on HBO, you should watch it just for his turn as Tyrion Lannister.)  Other notable newcomers are Sid’s Granny, voiced by Wanda Sykes and Shira (JLo) a feline member of Gutt’s crew, but ultimately a love interest for Diego (Leary).  Granny ended up with the guys after Sid’s family dropped in and abandoned her.  They aren’t a very loving bunch, as fans of the series know, but we did get to meet the famous Uncle Fungus, if just briefly.  Sykes’ Granny is one of the highlights of the movie, as she steals every scene she is in.

You stole the thought right out of my head.  Sykes was, by far, my favorite new addition.  She is just consistently rad, her stand-up “I’ma Be Me” is amazing.  Back to ‘Continental Drift’, I did thoroughly enjoy this movie.  Although, I also thoroughly despise paying extra for 3D, which every single animated movie seems to be.  But I know I’ve complained about this before – so I’ll save my spiel.  I think what I enjoy most about the Ice Age movies is the way they intermingle the childish humor with adult jokes.  Not all of the kids movie’s pull this off quite as cleverly.  One of my other favorite things to do with these animated films is to try and guess who’s voices are behind the characters.  This movie boggled my mind, other than JLO and Sykes.  I was so surprised that Dinklage was the voice of Gutt!

I’m not a fan of the nearly universal 3D movies either.  It does seem to be just a money grab, but as Maria said, enough of that.  As I’ve mentioned before, the animated movies for kids are much more likely to entertain than the rest of the movies they pump out of Hollywood.  I enjoyed the fourth Ice Age.  The new characters were a good fit, the story was a little far-fetched, but hell they were being chased by a dinosaur in the last one (even Sid made a joke about that).  It was a good time and an hour and a half well spent.  That all being said, I did have the feeling that this should be it for the gang.  I’m not saying I wouldn’t go to the next one if they made it, but I think it’s time to wrap it up.  It was my least favorite of the four, and I’d hate to leave an Ice Age movie that I didn’t like.  Maybe just give Scrat his own show on Nickelodeon.

I agree darling, I think 4 is enough.  And I would totally be watching the Scrat show.

Ross’ Rating: 3.5 Gummy Bears out of 5.

Maria’s Rating: 3 Gummies.

Starring: Matthew McConaughey, Channing Tatum and Alex Pettyfer

Rated R. Running time: 110 minutes

Ladies, leave your significant other at home for this outting – I guarantee he’ll be thankful.  This movie is 110 minutes of pure hip girating, stage humping and chiseled abs bliss.  Perhaps I wouldn’t have found it as entertaining if I didn’t have my girlfriend Alex with me, who was all but trying to shove dollar bills through the screen.  During this film you should not expect your fellow watchers to stay quiet – as we were not the only women hooting and hollering in the theatre.  I guess there was a plot, but it was hard to stay focused with a half naked Channing Tatum running around.  Mainly, the story is about a veteran male stripper who takes a stripping “virgin” under his wing.  He not only teaches him to work the crowd and make some serious cash, but also how to party hard and pick up women.  McConaughey does a fantastic job as Dallas, the owner/operator of the club ‘Xquisite’.  His delivery is not only hilarious, but somewhat genuine.  As we know from celebrity gossip, McConaughey enjoys hanging out in the nude and playing bongos – both of which are featured in the film.  Another noteworthy performance is Channing Tatum, as Mike.  He’s the “captain” of this strip squad and judging by his moves on stage – with good reason.  My girlfriends and sisters and mothers and every other red blooded woman on the planet had been talking this guy up.  I wasn’t a huge fan until I saw the talent he exhibited in this film.  And the other things he exhibited also.

So, as you few proud, brave and loyal followers of MRSRAG know, we are a team in our reviews as well as our lives.  This is the first, and possibly the last, review you will ever see that both of us have not seen, tasted, witnessed, or experienced the happenings reported on.  That being said, I believe I have some pertinent input to impart.  Firstly, when Maria said she wanted to see this movie, I was all for her going with her friend and not me.  I am not homophobic, but I couldn’t possibly understand why any heterosexual male would want to see it.  Also, I am very confident in our relationship, and totally understand if she would like to see, and hoot at some beefcake.  I ain’t all bad, but beefcake, I am not.  Finally, a funny anecdote: we were staying with my childhood/best friend Bruce, his lovely wife Kris and their awesome daughter Hannah at the time.  We had done our own thing for the day, as they did.  They came home to find our rental gone, but also tons of lights and the TV on when they arrived.  With puzzled looks they asked me with their eyes, huh?  I said, oh Maria went out with her friend Alex to see the movie Magic Mike.  It’s about male strippers, I’m good with missing that one.  A few minutes later, Kris sits down next to me and with a worried tone and look says, “Maria went with her guy friend to see Magic Mike?”  I laughed and said, no, Alex is a girl.  I’m confident in our relationship, but that scenario wouldn’t have fit into my comfort zone.  It was a funny aside though, don’t you think?

I found that very funny.  Also, I would like to mention that Bruce’s other daugther Amanda (21), informed us that Channing Tatum was, in fact, a male stripper.  Apparently, the story is loosely based on Tatum’s knowledge of the industry.  This explains A LOT.  Especially the epic solo dancing and choreographed numbers he nailed.  Needless to say, beefcake body aside, I was impressed.  Although, when it comes down to it, the two lead characters (Tatum and McConaughey) are just playing exaggerated versions of themselves.  Newcomer Pettyfer holds his own as “the kid” too, which is not to be overlooked in this intimidating cast.  Well, they must have been doing something right – as I understand it, the sequel has already been confirmed and they have plans to take it to broadway!  Honestly, apart from the wonderful visuals, Magic Mike was lacking something, maybe heart.  Director Steven Soderberg didn’t skimp on any of the nudity…so that wasn’t it.  The movie was definitely entertaining, but I probably could have waited until it came out on DVD.  Fortuantely for the cast & crew, I believe my fellow female viewers couldn’t wait that long!  And will assuredly be lined up at Broadway ticket booths and to view the sequeal ASAP.

I don’t really have anything else to contribute to this review.  I will give Maria props for not inadvertantly screaming out “Channing” or “Matthew” when we were finally alone in the dark later that night.  She did buy me a pair of tear away pants and bongos the next day though.  J.K. 

Maria’s Rating: 3.5 Gummy Bears out of 5.

Ross’ Rating:  N/A.  But… 2.5 Gummies for not having to go.  (Would’ve been 5 except for the 2.5 that came off for not being with Maria for 4 hours.)

Starring the voices of: Kelly Macdonald, Billy Connolly, Emma Thompson.

PG.  Animated.  Running Time: 1 hour 40 minutes.

Sorry, we were on vacation in the great, hot North for a couple of weeks.  Back to chilly Florida for a few, then off again.  In the meantime, back to “work.”  While we were gone we took Ethan to Disney Pixar’s Brave, the story of a young, gloriously redheaded Scottish Princess who desperately wants to live her life on her own terms, not the strictly arranged path her parents have laid out for her.  Kelly Macdonald (Boardwalk Empire and the final Harry Potter installment) does a nice job with the voice of our heroine, Princess Merida, and her relationship with her mother Queen Elinor (Emma Thompson) is the backbone of the movie.  When Merida ventures into the forest to ask an old witch for a spell to help her gain control of her own destiny, the fit hits the shan, and the movie takes a drastic turn.  I usually love these movies.  How To Train Your Dragon, by the same group, is one of my all time favorite animated films.  And I by no means hated Brave, but it just fell short for me.  I can’t put my finger on it.  Hoping Maria will inspire me to find the right words after I read her first thoughts.

Brave is definitely worth the price of admission, but as Ross put it – it just fell short.  I still enjoyed watching it, mostly because I could listen to those Scottish accents all day.  Perhaps, I was unimpressed because it was just a variation on a theme that we have seen an endless number of times.  It definitely added a different twist to the formula, but for the most part resembled a story I have seen reused ad nauseum.  There were aspects of the film that made up for the formulaic plot, such as the breathtaking animation and visuals.  I also found it very easy to relate to Merida’s character.  The relationship between mother and daughter struck a chord with me as well.  I would be leary of bringing very small children to view the film, as some of the violent action scenes were frightening even to the eight year olds accompanying us.

Oh absolutely.  It wasn’t as bad as say The Hunger Games, where we were surrounded by 8-12 year olds.  (Truly, I don’t know what some people are thinking, that movie was WAY too much for young kids.)  But Brave did have several fairly scary moments during some of the bear scenes.  At any rate, I think I’ve gotten to the reasoning behind my feelings for this movie.  I’m fairly certain I’m evolved enough to thouroughly enjoy a movie with strong, dominant female leads, which Brave certainly has.  I loved Girl With The Dragon Tattoo, for example.  So that isn’t it.  I’m pretty sure what is lacking in this film for me, is a villian.  There is no one to hate.  Nothing to root against.  Merida’s parents mean well.  The witch just gives you exactly what you want, maybe not how you want it, but she is not malevolent at all.   There is a scary bear, but he isn’t what he seems, and he’s nowhere near the center of the story.  You’d be hard pressed to think of an all-time great movie without a superior villian.  We need somone to hate, and ultimately to vanquish.  Brave is decent cinema.  I would tepidly recommend you take your kid to see it, or go see it on your own if you love everything animated like I do.  I’m guessing you’ll land somewhere close to me when you leave; wishing you went to see Madagascar 3 one more time instead.

Wow…Ross just blew my mind.  He’s absolutely right.  I didn’t hate anyone in the movie.  I was rooting for something though.  I wanted Merida and her mother to finally understand each other.  I wanted them to communicate and figure out a compromise that met both of their needs.  The villain was an intangible emotion.  It was stubborness.  And not just on account of her parents, but her own rigid demeanor.  It took a heinous spell to teach them both a valuable lesson.  The key to making any relationship work is communication.  I think its so important to incorporate these life lessons into children’s entertainment and in that respect Brave was successful.

You’re right honey, the “villian” was an intangible emotion.  Not exactly going to make us forget about Hannibal Lecter or The Wicked Witch of the West.  I like my villians tangible.

Maria’s Rating: 3 out of 5 Gummy Bears.

Ross’ Rating: 2.5 Gummies.

Starring:  Liam Neeson, Dermot Mulroney, Frank Grillo, Dallas Roberts.

R.  Action/Adventure.  Running time: 1 hour 57 Minutes.

We missed this one in the theaters, but as we are both Liam Neeson fans (truth be told, I have a borderline man-crush on the guy), we rented it out of our local Blockbuster machine at Publix right after it came out.  Now I realize that Hollywood often lacks imagination, but this movie takes it to its worst levels.  It is 100% a cross between the 1993 movie Alive (minus the cannibalism) and 1997’s The Edge with Alec Baldwin and Anthony Hopkins.  100%.  Now I loved both of those movies, but come on, been there, done that.  And both of those movies had something The Grey lacks; suspense, interesting plotlines, great acting.  Other than Frank Grillo as Diaz, this is basically a one man show, and definitely not one of Liam’s shining moments.  He sleepwalks through this one, and there isn’t one turn you don’t see coming a mile away.  One word keeps going through my head, disappointed.

Honestly, The Grey NEVER grabbed me.  There were a few fleeting moments of interest such as the violent plane crash and the appearance of the giant wolves, but Ross is right – it was a major disappointment.  Perhaps I expect too much out of Neeson.  I’m a big fan and I’m usually so impressed, but I guess I just prefer watching him do what I think he does best – beat the crap out of bad guys.  Luckily, we only wasted $2 renting it.  The most shocking element of this film was the dogged appearance of a very poorly aging Dermot Mulroney, he was almost unrecognizable as Talget.

Oh man I almost forgot, Dermot Mulroney!  I didn’t even know it was him until Maria pointed him out to me halfway through the movie.  Dude looks OLD.  I really wanted to like this movie, but it was impossible.  Boring and as I mentioned, the most blatant rip-off since Kevin Costner remade Road Warrior, on the ocean, with Waterworld in 1995.  And Liam just doesn’t seem the same since his wife died.  There’s just a constant twinge of sadness about him all the time.  Maybe I’m imagining it, I still love the guy.  Anyway, if you do take anything away from this review, it would be my wish that any of you out there who haven’t seen either Alive (based on the true story of the Uruguayan rugby team that crashed in the Andes), or The Edge (Alec Baldwin at his best and of course the always awesome Hopkins); make it a point to find them.  Those two movies will not disappoint.

I found Alive a bit disturbing (the whole true story and eating people thing was a lot), but I absolutely loved The Edge.  Anthony Hopkins was unbelievably charming as the uber intelligent Charles Morse.  Quite frankly, instead of renting this painfully long and boring new release, do yourself a favor and look up the older films as Ross suggested.  I found this film almost unbearable.  At a running time of nearly two hours, I was surprised I didn’t doze off.

Maria’s rating: 1.5 Gummy Bears out of 5

Ross’ Rating:  2 Gummies.  For Liam, even asleep he’s worth a deuce.

(Starring the voices of: Ben Stiller, Chris Rock, David Schwimmer, Jada Pinkett Smith, Sacha Baron Cohen)

PG.  Animated.  Running Time: 1 hour & 33minutes.

We actually took my little boy Ethan (he’s 8) to this movie on the day it came out, June 8th, but we went away for the weekend to celebrate Maria’s birthday (she’s 28).  Apologies for the delay, but we had a grand time.  Needless to say, Ethan and I see all the kids movies worth going to.  Percentage-wise, they are consistently better than the mainstream Hollywood movies.  The latest in the Madagascar franchise is no exception.

It was a wonderful birthday weekend and going to see Madagascar 3 kicked it off.  I love a kids movie, but as you can imagine I wasn’t seeing them as frequently as I do now with Ethan and Ross.  The Madagascar trilogy is one of my favorites and it embodies what I believe is the best recipe for a kids movie: adult humor mixed with childish antics, dancing accompanied by pop music and a heart warming story centered around morals and friendship.  The film is spackled with sub-plots involving lovable characters such as the penguins, King Julian and my personal favorite, Mort.

Our heroes are all back and end up in Europe this time, on their never ending quest to get back to their beloved NY.  Those scene stealing penguins and their monkey lackeys return as well, and don’t disappoint.  Frances McDormand does a wonderfully sinister voice for the relentless, French Captain Dubois the leader of Animal Control, who has a single minded, dogged pursuit for Alex The Lion’s head.  The movies haven’t seen this kind of never-say-die persistence since Jackie Gleason’s, Sheriff Buford T. Justice chased Burt Reynold’s, “The Bandit” in the 1977 classic, “Smokey and the Bandit”.   Alex, Marty, Melman and Gloria have to join the circus to try and escape, and the characters they meet are superb.  Of course our favorite lemur, King Julian (Baron Cohen) is back, and his budding romance with Sonya, the huge, tricycle riding circus bear is hilarious.  Bryan Cranston (from A&E’s Breaking Bad) as Vitaly the Russian Tiger is also worth noting.

A clever twist on the recurring plot and the introduction of some new characters made this film wickedly entertaining.  McDormand’s hilariously over-the-top accent and animation makes for a villain you absolutely love to hate.  And Cranston’s Vitaly portrays the hard-edged, ‘chip on his shoulder’ antagonist who thrives off the newly found friendship with our beloved zoo crew.  It’s just one of those kids movies that you not only don’t mind taking your kids to see, but look forward to viewing yourself as well!  I do have one important question…must every single movie be in 3D!?

Couldn’t agree more baby, the 3D is too much.  Seems an excuse to charge $3 more per person, and I don’t notice an appreciable improvement of viewing quality.  That aside, Madagascar 3 is an excellent way to spend an hour and a half, with or without the kids.

Ross’ Rating-  4 Gummy Bears out of 5.

Maria’s Rating-  3.5 Gummies.

{Starring: Kristen Stewart, Chris Hemsworth and Charlize Theron}

PG-13. Action/Adventure. Running time: 2 hours & 7 minutes.

Ross and I had an interesting evening at the movies this past Friday.  If you haven’t noticed EVERY single movie that comes out in theatres these days is either some sort of remake or the 7th sequel of some series. (Thats called alliteration people.)

Nice honey.  Yes it was interesting.  Let’s be honest, we didn’t know what the hell we wanted to do.  Snow White appealed to both of us, but the times weren’t working.  We went to the Jupiter Inlet, watched the water and the boats, and got eaten by mosquitos.  Had some frozen yogurt,  (a review for another day), and killed just enough time to make the 10:15 PM showing.

10:15 PM…there’s the start of our adventure.  I am by no means old, but boy did I feel that way at a 10:15 PM movie.  I can’t remember the last time I went to a movie that started later than 8 o’clock.  Ross and I were feeling a bit fickle as we mulled over getting a large popcorn.  We always get popcorn, its basically sacreligious not to.

Actually, we were a bit delerious because we were thinking of experimenting with a large popcorn and no drink.

Experimenting is an interesting choice of words.  What Ross means is, I turned around and asked, “Baby, what do you want to drink?”  To which he replied, “Nothing.”  Then I laughed and said, “What the hell are you going to do, beg the guy next to you for a sip of his diet coke…we’ll be choking in there.”  Needless to say there was more excitement at the usher’s stand.

Indeed there was my darling.  I handed him our tickets and he said, “2nd theater on your left”.  Well I happened to spot a poster of the soon to be released Bourne movie, without Matt Damon, to my right and had to go check it out.  The dude lost his mind; “NO!  I said to the left!!”  Easy kimosabe, I’m just checking out a friggin’ poster.  Anyway, to top it off, the theater is packed, so cold you could hang meat in it and the seat next to us was “Out of Order”.  I shit you not, the fucking seat was Out of Order!

You are probably asking yourself the same question I did, “How the hell can a seat be out of order?”  I mean, it appeared to have the usual makings of a theatre seat – cushion, back and arms.  Anyways, lets put the time, popcorn, usher and seat incidents aside and start talking about the movie.  It may tip you off a bit, since we’ve been blabbing -that the movie was by far the least interesting occurrence of the night.

Yes, the movie.  It wasn’t horrible.  It also wasn’t very good.  Too long.  Too dark.  Kristen Stewart reminds me of a female Hugh Grant.  No range and plays the same character in every movie.  She Bella’d her way through this one, with one tiny scene of something resembling passionate acting.  Charlize Theron was way over the top as the evil Queen, trying to steal every scene.  Chris “Thor” Hemsworth wasn’t bad as the damaged Huntsman.  But the best part of the movie, BY FAR, were the “dwarves”, played by full size actors including Ian McShane, Ray Winstone, a very old looking Bob Hoskins and Eddie Marsan (Inspector Lestrade from the Sherlock Holmes movies).  They came in very late and were grossly underused.  I have a way of judging how much I like a movie.  When it comes out on DVD will I rush to get it?  Can’t wait to see it again?  If the answer is “yes”, well that is very good.  Snow White?  Maybe when it’s finally on HBO, if there’s nothing else on at 1AM.

Well, here I go, defending Kristen Stewart again.  I can’t help that I love tween themed entertainment.  I’m bordering a Twihard and I’m proud of that.  However, I do admit that I feel as though everytime I turn around there’s some Twilight star trying to break free of their defining role.  I thought Stewart was the wrong choice for this one.  She is a beautiful girl, but she just didn’t capture the essence of this childhood heroine.  I agree that Charlize was trying to steal every scene as the evil queen Raveena, but more often than not she was successful.  I found myself captivated by her portrayal of the wretched queen.  Some of the scenes were a bit over-the-top.  For instance, the one featuring her bathing in some sort of white, milky plaster…or whatever the hell it was supposed to be.  Overall, I felt that the film was lacking something.  I did enjoy the dwarves, but as Ross said we could have used a lot more of them.  The movie kept the integrity of the fairytale, but tried to make up for its lack of heart with too much action.

I have a feeling honey that we’ll be pretty close on our final ratings of this movie.  I definitely had more fun getting there than I did watching.  But then again, I would have a fantastic time watching grass grow with you my love.  Let’s wrap this puppy up.  We’ve already spent more time on it than it deserved.

I could not agree more.  He’s so fucking sweet, isn’t he?

Maria’s rating: 2.5 Gummy Bears out of 5.

Ross’ rating: I concur my darling.  2.5 Gummies, for the dwarves!